A Change in Plans.....

---- frank discussion ---

So there's been a change in  plans..... Sir and i did not get our Friday playtime, but we are rescheduled for Monday, instead.

And i am relieved, because it's my fault that things fell through.

i have shared that Sir has been pressing me to find a female partner, and i am reluctant. Well, make that, violently opposed. i don't like it, i don't want to, i'm not anywhere near ready to accept it, and i told Sir about my objections. i cannot stress to you, my readers, how serious i am about this. the very idea makes me sick to my stomach.

As you can imagine, Sir was less than pleased with my stubborn refusal, and we had a difficult conversation. This led to Friday's cancellation. i was afraid, actually, that Sir would decide He was done with me. and i KNOW that subs, by definition, are subject to their Dom's commands. i'm not trying to reverse roles or push the boundaries or play a game with this. i seriously, seriously object.

Suffice it to say, it was very painful. i knew that Sir was highly displeased. i admitted to Him that i was afraid of His reaction. And the next day, when i informed Him as usual about completing my morning ice cube task, He asked my why i had done it. And i told Him the truth - that i am not trying to walk away, i am not looking to discontinue our arrangement; i still wear His collar, and i still want permission to keep wearing it. 

Luckily for me, Sir believes that i am sincere in my desire, and He is granting me an audience so that we can share some time together. i know He will see that i truly do wish to remain His.